I generally try to make at least one bad decision per day. Yesterday it was taking my bike over the border, winding up in some tiny Swiss town, having no idea how to get back to Konstanz, and consulting maps in a church cemetary. Today it was wandering into the jewelery store, and spontaneously and spur-of-the-momently getting my ears pierced while I was completely alone and an hour before I had class.
I'd been thinking about getting it done for awhile, and Sungmi had even offered to do them for me. But as much as I trust Asians with anything and everything beauty related, somehow the prospect of a professional with an earring gun sounded alot better than Sungmi (as much as I love her) putting holes in my head with nondescript household objects, namely a needle, a magic marker, and a lighter.
So, just curiously, I wandered into Aforementioned Jewelery Store and asked how much money I would have to give them in exchange for them perforating my face. "7 Euros" said Store Lady, "But I'm afraid dear that you have to be at least 16." "Well, that's good," I said, "because I'm 20." Store Lady stared at me for like 30 seconds, started laughing and said "Seriously? Because you look like you're fourteen." Thanks, Store Lady. Anyway, Store Lady had me pick out earrings, threw a stool down in the middle of the store, and said "Now don't you worry, Other Store Lady is going to do them for you. I've pierced ears before, but only once, and...well...Other Store Lady will do it. Other Store Lady, you'll do it, right?" "Hells no," Other Store Lady said, "you can do it."
Wow, Store Ladies, really not making me feel comfortable right about now.
Anyway, Store Ladies pulled about 8 billion different gadgets out of packages, sterilized things for like 8 years, and finally pulled out Earring Gun. "Don't worry," said Store Lady, "I've practiced alot." What I felt like saying was "With all due respect Store Lady, I totally wasn't worrying until you pointed out that you'd only ever done this once, and hinted that it didn't go so well. The thought of you practicing on dummy heads doesn't make me feel any better, and, if truth be told, I think this is a terrible idea, I don't trust you to put holes in ears eithout killing me in the process, and Sungmi with a lighter is sounding alot safer right about now." But I didn't actually say anything.
Hole 1 went quite well, but when Store Lady put Hole 2 in (with Other Store Lady muttering helpful hints and suggestions along the way, which disturbed me even more), they both freaked out. I don't know why they both went nuts, but when they freaked out I freaked out, and Store Lady going "It's okay! It's okay! I think it's okay!" pretty much put me over the edge. I stood up, but as soon as I did, the entire room went white, everyone's voices went about three octaves lower, and I went into total Get Away From Crazy Ladies Wielding Earring Guns mode. I paid, took the little leaflet they gave me and the bottle of cleaner so my ears don't get infected and fall off, and was out of there like lightning.
In retrospect, having Sungmi do my ears probably would have been less traumatizing, but they actually look quite nice, if I do say so myself. Marina said they really bring out the color of my eyes, which confuses me alot because my earrings are blue, but I figure at least now I can wear crap off the sides of my face like normal people.
Adios amigos
29 April 2008
28 April 2008
I touched a yak!
So the weather has been absolutley perfect the last two days (almost making up for a solid month and a half of mostly rain), so we celebrated in style!
Friday night we were hanging out in my apartment, and there were like eight parties going on somewhere below us. We were sitting at the table, and all of a sudden this weird kid walked by the window dressed in drag, gave us this creepy grin and waved. I was vaguely disturbed.
Saturday Sungmi and I went down to the Rhine for a picnic, which was really sweet. We just kind of chilled out for two hours, flew our kites off the bridge, and I somehow, in the middle of April in Germany, managed to get sunburnt. But only on one shoulder, which means half of me is red and the other half is pasty white, which also means everyone I know has been laughing at me. Took lots of pictures, and Sungmi, in her typical South Korean Ridiculous Adorableness made this:
Friday night we were hanging out in my apartment, and there were like eight parties going on somewhere below us. We were sitting at the table, and all of a sudden this weird kid walked by the window dressed in drag, gave us this creepy grin and waved. I was vaguely disturbed.
Saturday Sungmi and I went down to the Rhine for a picnic, which was really sweet. We just kind of chilled out for two hours, flew our kites off the bridge, and I somehow, in the middle of April in Germany, managed to get sunburnt. But only on one shoulder, which means half of me is red and the other half is pasty white, which also means everyone I know has been laughing at me. Took lots of pictures, and Sungmi, in her typical South Korean Ridiculous Adorableness made this:
That night the traveling circus was in town! http://www.circus-probst.de/ So a bunch of us headed down to check it out, and it wound up being pretty sweet. The camels were quite cool, as was an emu they had jumping over the camels, which was mostly awesome because it was being bad and just running around in circles, eventually making 3 circus handlers chase it around the ring. Plus also they had a yak, which was probably the coolest thing I've ever seen ever.
Today was American Breakfast Sunday again, so Sungmi, Fabio and I cooked an entire carton of eggs, four packages of bacon, and two big things of pancake mix for everyone which was way fun. Another American from two floors down stopped by, we gave him breakfast, and he was telling us about a party he'd been to Friday night. Conversation went like this:
Him: So the theme of the party was dress-in-drag.
Me: Oh! That's what that was! Because some weird kid came up to our window in a black dress and waved at me, and I was really freaked out.
Him: Yeah? What was he wearing?
Me: Little black dress, a pearl necklace.
Him: A pink scarf?
Me: I can't remember, but definitely the pearls.
Him: Yeah, that was me.
Me: Oh. *long pause* Cute dress.
Afterwards we headed down to a Bodensee Park right over the border to play frisbee and wander around. On the way we passed behind the circus where a bunch of the animals were out, and guess what? I TOUCHED THE YAK. My life is complete, and if I die in my sleep tonight, I can die happy because for fifteen seconds I got to pet a giant horned beast that hails from the same country as the Dalai Lama. Seriously, how many people can say they've touched a yak?
Yak=love.
26 April 2008
Monica Lewinsky
Can we talk about this? Can we discuss how I got assigned to do an oral presentation on Bill Clinton's sex buddy to a class of native German speakers? Can someone shoot me in the face now and get in over with?
Laugh at me all you want, but american culture gets torn to shreds in the class, which makes for a really awkward hour and a half of me twitching in my chair and praying no one asks where I'm from. How about, instead of Monica, I do an impromptu change of topic to something like the Third Reich, and watch you all squirm? I just might.
In other news, the Autobahn is really not all it's cracked up to be; sort of like the Jersey Turnpike but faster and cleaner.
Nothing much new, we all went out to Latino's tonight, which is this bar/resturaunt thing with really kickass nachos. It's supposed to be Mexican food, but considering the German love of culinary products blander than air, the hottest foods here tend to be spiced with salt. Which doesn't make for very mexican Mexican, but I, however, love this country.
Weekend is gearing up to be pretty sweet, complete with picnics, circuses, Italian/American cook-fests, and Greek Orthodox Easter. I don't get it either, but Marina says she'll give us Greek food. I'm down.
Adios!
Laugh at me all you want, but american culture gets torn to shreds in the class, which makes for a really awkward hour and a half of me twitching in my chair and praying no one asks where I'm from. How about, instead of Monica, I do an impromptu change of topic to something like the Third Reich, and watch you all squirm? I just might.
In other news, the Autobahn is really not all it's cracked up to be; sort of like the Jersey Turnpike but faster and cleaner.
Nothing much new, we all went out to Latino's tonight, which is this bar/resturaunt thing with really kickass nachos. It's supposed to be Mexican food, but considering the German love of culinary products blander than air, the hottest foods here tend to be spiced with salt. Which doesn't make for very mexican Mexican, but I, however, love this country.
Weekend is gearing up to be pretty sweet, complete with picnics, circuses, Italian/American cook-fests, and Greek Orthodox Easter. I don't get it either, but Marina says she'll give us Greek food. I'm down.
Adios!
24 April 2008
Prozac/New Friends/Aikido
Lots of stuff happened today!
So today started out pretty crappy. I have way too much free time for my own good, so I decided to find another class to take, and I found a cool translation course that sounded interesting. But when I went today, the professor was like “Is there anyone here who missed the first class?” I raised my hand and he started flipping out and yelling at me. Someone needs a nap, I think, or some Prozac. Anyway, Prozac Professor eventually made me write down my email address, and told me if he had room he’d email me. Which he did, but only to tell me I couldn’t take the class. Thanks.
Then on the bus, I was sitting next to this girl with a British flag sewn onto her purse. "Oh," I said, "are you from England?" "No," she said, "but God knows it's better than an American flag." And then, of course, she asked, "So where are you from?" Oh Fuck. "America." *long pause* "Oh. Sorry." She pretty much teleported off the bus, she was gone that fast.
Then, as I was biking to aikido, this random girl stopped me and asked if I knew where the Sporthalle was. I told her I was going too, so we went together, and established we were both going for aikido. Yay another new friend! She’s Russian, born in
Anyway, aikido:
Dear all the martial artists I know,
Chris, Jen, Bruce, Zack, and is there anyone else I know who’s reading this that does martial arts? I could really use some advice, so help me out. Which is worse, doing no aikido or questionable aikido for the next few months? I think part of the problem is I went in with such high expectations, assuming the group I found would be the German equivalent of the group back in the US, and it’s a pretty far cry away, it’s not even on the same playing field. In fact, if the group in the
Verdict 1: German aikido men are total and complete pansies.
Verdict 2: The aikido looks (to me) kind of flowery—there was lots of bringing your attacker around your entire body twice before doing anything, standing on your toes and doing weird backbends. I don’t understand, but I’m so desperate to do something, but is it worth it? I don’t know. Half the problem is I suck and I don't know what I'm doing
Verdict 3: The sensei seems okay, but as Russian Friend and I were biking back, she said “Can I tell you something? I’m not a huge fan of the sensei.” “Yeah,” I said, “I got weird vibes too.” “I think it’s something spiritual,” she said, “but whatever it is, it feels pretty fundamental, and it’s definitely lacking.” “I have no idea about anything,” I said, “but I do think I know what you’re talking about.” It doesn’t feel like there’s any intent behind anything he does. Anyway, I have no idea, I’m too new to really know what’s going on, what do you guys think? Should I go once or twice, and then see how I feel? Am I just not being open to new teaching styles? Russian Friend said she’s heard there’s an aikido dojo in Kreuzlingen, maybe we'll check them out first before we make any decisions. But if somebody who knows what they're talking about could help out the stupid newbie, that would be awesome.
Final Verdict: Sorely disappointed.
On a positive note, we have oven racks again. Here’s to hoping no other kitchen appliances are subjected to CR’s random acts of charity.22 April 2008
Oven Racks
First year roommate was disturbing, roommate last semester was nonexistent, but Chinese Roommate is just weird. Not different. Just weird.
Among other things, Vegemite and I finally discovered what she was doing those three nights she kept us all awake. Apparently she was throwing a ball against the wall and not digging a tunnel to China as had previously been thought, and which, in retrospect, would have made more sense. I don't know if it's bizarre exercise that can only be done when the moon is full or what, but CR found reason to throw a handball against a concrete wall for four hours a night, 3 days in a row, and only at ungodly hours, namely 2 o clock in the morning.
The reason for this post is that I just got yelled at for using the liquid boiler thing in the kitchen to boil liquid. When CR approached me (liquid boiler in hand), and delivered her sermon on Why It Was Wrong For Me To Boil Liquid In The Liquid Boiler Even Though I Cleaned The Goddamned Thing Afterwards, I was like "Oh, p.s Chinese Roommate, do you have any idea where our oven racks went? Because I went to use the oven today, but the oven racks are gone and I can't find them." "Oh," said CR, "I gave them away."
I'm sorry, come again? You gave away our oven racks? You gave away our oven racks? Jesus Mary and Joseph Christ on a Sidecar with an order of the Whore of Babylon and everything else that is swear-worthy in every religious book on the planet. I'm all for helping the poor or what not, but it seems to be like a better idea to join the Peace Corps, Doctors Without Borders, or that organization that fixes cleft lips for a dollar. Or, if it's donating that you fancy, you can give money, give clothing, give old books you haven't read in years or toys you never liked from your childhood and write them off as tax-deductible. Personally, I'm all for adopting babies from Guatemala, digging ditches for farmers in Columbia, signing up for newsletters out of guilt, buying homeless people sandwiches, doing canned food drives, going to Bono concerts and hells-yes-ing Bill Gates philanthropy. Somehow I feel as those all of these would accomplish more than giving away the goddamned oven racks.
Seriously, what are third world children going to do with oven racks? "Gee, thanks Red Cross, I'm starving, my country's been ravaged by war, big business and western politics, I've had malaria eight times, and the one history textbook that exists in my single room roofless schoolhouse still says there's an iron curtain across Europe, but now that you've given me these kick-ass oven racks, I really feel that my life is going to change for the better."
Jesus Mary and Joseph Christ on a Sidecar with an order of the Whore of Babylon, I am so pissed off. But more than that, I just don't understand.
Among other things, Vegemite and I finally discovered what she was doing those three nights she kept us all awake. Apparently she was throwing a ball against the wall and not digging a tunnel to China as had previously been thought, and which, in retrospect, would have made more sense. I don't know if it's bizarre exercise that can only be done when the moon is full or what, but CR found reason to throw a handball against a concrete wall for four hours a night, 3 days in a row, and only at ungodly hours, namely 2 o clock in the morning.
The reason for this post is that I just got yelled at for using the liquid boiler thing in the kitchen to boil liquid. When CR approached me (liquid boiler in hand), and delivered her sermon on Why It Was Wrong For Me To Boil Liquid In The Liquid Boiler Even Though I Cleaned The Goddamned Thing Afterwards, I was like "Oh, p.s Chinese Roommate, do you have any idea where our oven racks went? Because I went to use the oven today, but the oven racks are gone and I can't find them." "Oh," said CR, "I gave them away."
I'm sorry, come again? You gave away our oven racks? You gave away our oven racks? Jesus Mary and Joseph Christ on a Sidecar with an order of the Whore of Babylon and everything else that is swear-worthy in every religious book on the planet. I'm all for helping the poor or what not, but it seems to be like a better idea to join the Peace Corps, Doctors Without Borders, or that organization that fixes cleft lips for a dollar. Or, if it's donating that you fancy, you can give money, give clothing, give old books you haven't read in years or toys you never liked from your childhood and write them off as tax-deductible. Personally, I'm all for adopting babies from Guatemala, digging ditches for farmers in Columbia, signing up for newsletters out of guilt, buying homeless people sandwiches, doing canned food drives, going to Bono concerts and hells-yes-ing Bill Gates philanthropy. Somehow I feel as those all of these would accomplish more than giving away the goddamned oven racks.
Seriously, what are third world children going to do with oven racks? "Gee, thanks Red Cross, I'm starving, my country's been ravaged by war, big business and western politics, I've had malaria eight times, and the one history textbook that exists in my single room roofless schoolhouse still says there's an iron curtain across Europe, but now that you've given me these kick-ass oven racks, I really feel that my life is going to change for the better."
Jesus Mary and Joseph Christ on a Sidecar with an order of the Whore of Babylon, I am so pissed off. But more than that, I just don't understand.
21 April 2008
It's not weird, it's different
In the wise words of Claire, hold onto your lederhosen ladies and gentlemen, and advance apologies for the long-ness that is about to occur.
I don't know many people are reading this that took German with me in high school, or had Frau Stecher as a German teacher? Probably none (except you Amy), but for those of you who never met/had Frau, her motto was always "It's not weird, it's different." It's a good motto, and it got applied to any and every question we ever had about why Germany was so weird (or rather, why Germany isn't weird because it's just different.) Language? Culture? People/places/German TV? It's not weird, it's different.
Coming here, I've really tried to keep that motto alive, because it's useful and it puts things in perspective. Which is why, during the last three days of my life I spent following German riding students around, I latched onto it like a lifejacket and repeated it every two and a half seconds. You'll see why:
Okay, so horseshow! Student horseshows in Germany are pretty much the complete opposite of what they are in the US (and, no offense IHSA, but I think they're better in some ways, and this isn't american-inferiority complex talking here). Student horseshows in Germany are, among other things, a giant excuse to party. Everybody knows and loves everybody else from all the other teams, but the only time they see each other is at horseshows, which mean these events come out something like family reunion meets dance parties on speed and no sleep, and I mean this in the best way possible. They're also pretty evenly split male/female, which is (I must admit) a nice change.
Friday night is a giant themed costume party. The theme for this one was "Wetten, dass..." which is a German TV show I've never seen, but I still got thrown into a costume and made to go anyway. Being the only foreigner and with not-so-great German was (more than) a little overwhelming and intimidating, but I met lots of people which was cool, except when they asked me what my costume was, and I couldn't tell them. Also, we came back at 5.30 in the morning, got three hours of sleep on the floor of an elementary school gymnasium, and had to get up for Saturday.
Saturday was dressage day, and apparently a continuation of the costume party the night before, as I discovered when I had a minor heart attack over the dressage team that went in with googles and those little swimmie-armband floation devices on over their riding clothes, which (apparently) is perfect okay. But it's not weird, it's different. It was also really fun, because teams (while not really taking competition to heart in the ring), really tried to out-yell each other, as in every five minutes one team would go "oooooooOOOOOOHHHH...KONSTANZ!" or whatever their team name was. Girls would also occasionally yell "HANDSOME MAN ON HORSE!" whenever guys went into the ring, and vice versa. Lots of bursting out into song and dance a la musical all day, lots of yelling, and lots of crazy German dance music in the background. Like at one point a really tall kid from another team drew a pony to compete on, and when he entered the ring the DJ (because there was one) started playing a silly song "Du bist gerade auf dein Pony...", all about how "you're riding a pony, you look ridiculous, your feet are touching the ground," etc etc and everyone started singing it, and the poor kid was laughing so hard he almost didn't finish his dressage test.
Saturday night was another party, and I spent a solid two hours being taught a German drinking game involving bouncing a quarter off a table and into a mug (and it' dumb, p.s.). I also learned The Dance that everyone does--apparently it's a very old German dance that only the riding students have kept alive, and it involves lots of twirling and crazy fun stuff, and I promise I'll teach it to all of you because it's awesome, but you need a guy (who's volunteering?) and you have to do it to fast music. And speaking of music, just for the record, the German idea of what music is cool ceased progressing somewhere in the mid-80's, so if you've never heard La Bamba remixed to an electro beat before, I would recommend it, because it's not weird, it's different. I also taught the German kids the Cotton-Eye Joe, because while the song is popular, the dance just never made it over.
Also, if anyone tells you Germans have magical european livers of steel, that's a lie, because they don't. The only difference is it takes them four or five straight hours of drinking to only get half as drunk as americans, but they've got lots of fun little things to help pass the time. I learned all about klopfers or knockers, which are like these really mild shot-type things in a little bottle. They're called knockers because you have to get a group of friends, hold your little bottle upside down, bang it on the table for like 20 seconds screaming, rip the cap off, put the neck of the bottle between your teeth, and then drink. Klopfers got done every so often throughout the night (and before the night starts), as I found out about an hour before we left for the party. We had come back early to take naps, and when I woke up I heard "Tina needs one too!" I sat up to see what it was that I needed, and got hit in the chest with a bottle of alcohol, which in retrospect, is a situation that could really only occur to me in Germany. But! As Frau Stecher says, it's not weird, it's different.
Sunday was jumping day, which was pretty fun. But in Germany, tough horse draw is tough horse draw, and when the same horse throws off it's first three riders, good luck to rider number four, because that's what happened, and the German students did not understand why I did not understand. Casualty Number 2 landed on his knees, and I can only imagine how much that must have hurt! Also at the end of the every day, the top boy rider and the top girl rider have to compete against each other for the winner-of-the-day title, and at the end of it they have to grab each other, fall down, roll around on the ground, and pretend like they're making out. Which is not weird, it's just different. It's a tradition to represent no hard feelings or what not, or at least that's how it got explained to me? Then they have the awards ceremony, no ribbons, only prizes, and the Survivor's Cup for the team that stays the longest at the parties (which was us) gets given out, the prize for which was a box of klopfers.
Bear with me a little longer, but I just really need to get this out there:
At one point on Sunday during the show, somebody busted out a number of bright pink cut-out rubber breasts that a bunch of people hung around their necks and nonchalantly walked around in for the day. Then somebody thought it would be a good idea to hang one on a horse and go jump a course in it. With that in mind, I'd like to slightly edit the motto, because 90 percent of the time, it's different, but the other 10 percent of the time, it's horses jumping fences while wearing female genitalia, and no matter how much I carve that one up, that's just weird. And the fact that I was as completely unbothered as everyone else should be considered a sign and a cry for help.
Sorry for the really rambling really long post, but I know like 89 million people are going to be asking me what German student horseshows are like, so there. That's what they're like, complete with bizarre traditions, dances, and sex-shop merchandise. Riding today, will let you know how that goes, but right now, I'm going to sleep, I've spent the last two nights on a gym floor. Adios amigos!
I don't know many people are reading this that took German with me in high school, or had Frau Stecher as a German teacher? Probably none (except you Amy), but for those of you who never met/had Frau, her motto was always "It's not weird, it's different." It's a good motto, and it got applied to any and every question we ever had about why Germany was so weird (or rather, why Germany isn't weird because it's just different.) Language? Culture? People/places/German TV? It's not weird, it's different.
Coming here, I've really tried to keep that motto alive, because it's useful and it puts things in perspective. Which is why, during the last three days of my life I spent following German riding students around, I latched onto it like a lifejacket and repeated it every two and a half seconds. You'll see why:
Okay, so horseshow! Student horseshows in Germany are pretty much the complete opposite of what they are in the US (and, no offense IHSA, but I think they're better in some ways, and this isn't american-inferiority complex talking here). Student horseshows in Germany are, among other things, a giant excuse to party. Everybody knows and loves everybody else from all the other teams, but the only time they see each other is at horseshows, which mean these events come out something like family reunion meets dance parties on speed and no sleep, and I mean this in the best way possible. They're also pretty evenly split male/female, which is (I must admit) a nice change.
Friday night is a giant themed costume party. The theme for this one was "Wetten, dass..." which is a German TV show I've never seen, but I still got thrown into a costume and made to go anyway. Being the only foreigner and with not-so-great German was (more than) a little overwhelming and intimidating, but I met lots of people which was cool, except when they asked me what my costume was, and I couldn't tell them. Also, we came back at 5.30 in the morning, got three hours of sleep on the floor of an elementary school gymnasium, and had to get up for Saturday.
Saturday was dressage day, and apparently a continuation of the costume party the night before, as I discovered when I had a minor heart attack over the dressage team that went in with googles and those little swimmie-armband floation devices on over their riding clothes, which (apparently) is perfect okay. But it's not weird, it's different. It was also really fun, because teams (while not really taking competition to heart in the ring), really tried to out-yell each other, as in every five minutes one team would go "oooooooOOOOOOHHHH...KONSTANZ!" or whatever their team name was. Girls would also occasionally yell "HANDSOME MAN ON HORSE!" whenever guys went into the ring, and vice versa. Lots of bursting out into song and dance a la musical all day, lots of yelling, and lots of crazy German dance music in the background. Like at one point a really tall kid from another team drew a pony to compete on, and when he entered the ring the DJ (because there was one) started playing a silly song "Du bist gerade auf dein Pony...", all about how "you're riding a pony, you look ridiculous, your feet are touching the ground," etc etc and everyone started singing it, and the poor kid was laughing so hard he almost didn't finish his dressage test.
Saturday night was another party, and I spent a solid two hours being taught a German drinking game involving bouncing a quarter off a table and into a mug (and it' dumb, p.s.). I also learned The Dance that everyone does--apparently it's a very old German dance that only the riding students have kept alive, and it involves lots of twirling and crazy fun stuff, and I promise I'll teach it to all of you because it's awesome, but you need a guy (who's volunteering?) and you have to do it to fast music. And speaking of music, just for the record, the German idea of what music is cool ceased progressing somewhere in the mid-80's, so if you've never heard La Bamba remixed to an electro beat before, I would recommend it, because it's not weird, it's different. I also taught the German kids the Cotton-Eye Joe, because while the song is popular, the dance just never made it over.
Also, if anyone tells you Germans have magical european livers of steel, that's a lie, because they don't. The only difference is it takes them four or five straight hours of drinking to only get half as drunk as americans, but they've got lots of fun little things to help pass the time. I learned all about klopfers or knockers, which are like these really mild shot-type things in a little bottle. They're called knockers because you have to get a group of friends, hold your little bottle upside down, bang it on the table for like 20 seconds screaming, rip the cap off, put the neck of the bottle between your teeth, and then drink. Klopfers got done every so often throughout the night (and before the night starts), as I found out about an hour before we left for the party. We had come back early to take naps, and when I woke up I heard "Tina needs one too!" I sat up to see what it was that I needed, and got hit in the chest with a bottle of alcohol, which in retrospect, is a situation that could really only occur to me in Germany. But! As Frau Stecher says, it's not weird, it's different.
Sunday was jumping day, which was pretty fun. But in Germany, tough horse draw is tough horse draw, and when the same horse throws off it's first three riders, good luck to rider number four, because that's what happened, and the German students did not understand why I did not understand. Casualty Number 2 landed on his knees, and I can only imagine how much that must have hurt! Also at the end of the every day, the top boy rider and the top girl rider have to compete against each other for the winner-of-the-day title, and at the end of it they have to grab each other, fall down, roll around on the ground, and pretend like they're making out. Which is not weird, it's just different. It's a tradition to represent no hard feelings or what not, or at least that's how it got explained to me? Then they have the awards ceremony, no ribbons, only prizes, and the Survivor's Cup for the team that stays the longest at the parties (which was us) gets given out, the prize for which was a box of klopfers.
Bear with me a little longer, but I just really need to get this out there:
At one point on Sunday during the show, somebody busted out a number of bright pink cut-out rubber breasts that a bunch of people hung around their necks and nonchalantly walked around in for the day. Then somebody thought it would be a good idea to hang one on a horse and go jump a course in it. With that in mind, I'd like to slightly edit the motto, because 90 percent of the time, it's different, but the other 10 percent of the time, it's horses jumping fences while wearing female genitalia, and no matter how much I carve that one up, that's just weird. And the fact that I was as completely unbothered as everyone else should be considered a sign and a cry for help.
Sorry for the really rambling really long post, but I know like 89 million people are going to be asking me what German student horseshows are like, so there. That's what they're like, complete with bizarre traditions, dances, and sex-shop merchandise. Riding today, will let you know how that goes, but right now, I'm going to sleep, I've spent the last two nights on a gym floor. Adios amigos!
18 April 2008
The Weekend Ahead
Portuguese cookie-making was awesome, Marina has two Irish friends visiting so they all came, plus Fabio and a few other American/Canadian friends. Cookies were yummy, and it was quite a good time.
I feel like such a slacker, I'm taking four classes plus the literature course Margaret does with us, so technically five, but they only meet once a week for an hour and a half. Needless to say, I have a ridiculous amount of free time, but with aikido and horses, maybe not so much? I hope not. Should I pick up another class? I dunno :/.
Studi riding tournament in Bonn this weekend, leaving tonight at 7 and not coming back til Sunday. Will let you know on Monday how that goes (which I have no classes on because of aforementioned ridiculous amount of free time). Also I RIDE on Monday!!! HOORAY! And aikido on Tuesday!! HOORAY! Christ, time really flies here, how it already the middle of April?
Are-you-Portuguese count: 1! Woot!
Anyway, hope you all have a good weekend, see you in a few days! adios!
I feel like such a slacker, I'm taking four classes plus the literature course Margaret does with us, so technically five, but they only meet once a week for an hour and a half. Needless to say, I have a ridiculous amount of free time, but with aikido and horses, maybe not so much? I hope not. Should I pick up another class? I dunno :/.
Studi riding tournament in Bonn this weekend, leaving tonight at 7 and not coming back til Sunday. Will let you know on Monday how that goes (which I have no classes on because of aforementioned ridiculous amount of free time). Also I RIDE on Monday!!! HOORAY! And aikido on Tuesday!! HOORAY! Christ, time really flies here, how it already the middle of April?
Are-you-Portuguese count: 1! Woot!
Anyway, hope you all have a good weekend, see you in a few days! adios!
17 April 2008
Embracing Differentness
So my first Fo Shiz German class actually doesn't exist, and I was really mad about it because it was called Spanisch in Amerika, and it sounded really cool. But I found went to another Fo Shiz German class called "Dokumentation Bedrohter Sprachen" (Documentation of Endangered Languages) which is KICKASS. Like woah. It's entirely in German, but the book is in English, which is a little disappointing, but it seems like such a cool class, and the only thing I need to do for a grade is a) do or 30 minute presentation with 2 other people or b) write a ten page paper. I went to another class, but the professor said it was going to be taught entirely in English, so I got up and left. Seriously, if I wanted to take classes in English, I'd go to England, or just to Rutgers.
Anyway, today was also Marina's birthday! HAPPY BIRTHDAY WENCH! So we had a party! Marina baked cake, and then we all got dressed up and went to an italian seafood place where we had an awesome fifty year old Italian waiter who gave us lots of chocolates and spoke to us in a confusing mix of Italian and German. Then we met up with Vegemite (formerly German Girl Roommate) and German Boy Roommate, and went to a party at the Uni.
Okay, so about Uni parties. This is not America. They open up the main building and serve beer, wine, and crazy weird fruit cocktails. Three dance floors, crazy music and strobe lights, and only for students=kickass. Imagine RutgersFest on crack with school-provided alchohol and better music. It was really just way fun, even though we quickly lost Vegemite, and German Boy Roommate turned out to be Mr. Personality and sat in a corner by himself the whole night and didn't move. Whatever. Mr. Personality eventually left, and then it was just mad fun. Everyone kind of peeled off around one, but me and Fabio (my friend's German roommate, who's name isn't actually Fabio but I thought it was) hung around for another hour and danced like morons. When we got back to Europahaus, he was like "So, doing anything tomorrow?" I was like "Umm...we're making portuguese cookies. If you want to come?" (Which sounds totally ridiculous but that's what we're doing), but he thought it was awesome and said he'll come. HOORAY! New friends!!
Okay, so something interesting that happened tonight: we were all dancing in a circle, and this random kid with a mohawk (me and mohawks :/) came up and started talking to me. He asked me where I was from, and when I said Amerika he completely stopped and said "America? Really? America? You're American?" And the conversation went from there. That's when I realized that maybe being an American in Germany isn't totally awful. America is such a huge presence in the world, but most of the Germans I've talked to really haven't met many real-live normal Americans. It's not like being from Europe, where all the countries are so close together and students studying abroad is normal. America is a giant political/cultural/linguistic machine, but there's not that many of us representing. So being American is something of a conversation starter, even if it subjects you to intense interrogation about where exactly you're from, which big cities are nearby, where the interrogator's friends/neighbors/third cousin twice removed on the mother's side have visited, and whether you're for Hilary or Obama and why.
New policy, in addition to Just Say Ja, is hereby christened Embracing The Differentness, and Thereby The Inherent Awesomeness.
Anyway, today was also Marina's birthday! HAPPY BIRTHDAY WENCH! So we had a party! Marina baked cake, and then we all got dressed up and went to an italian seafood place where we had an awesome fifty year old Italian waiter who gave us lots of chocolates and spoke to us in a confusing mix of Italian and German. Then we met up with Vegemite (formerly German Girl Roommate) and German Boy Roommate, and went to a party at the Uni.
Okay, so about Uni parties. This is not America. They open up the main building and serve beer, wine, and crazy weird fruit cocktails. Three dance floors, crazy music and strobe lights, and only for students=kickass. Imagine RutgersFest on crack with school-provided alchohol and better music. It was really just way fun, even though we quickly lost Vegemite, and German Boy Roommate turned out to be Mr. Personality and sat in a corner by himself the whole night and didn't move. Whatever. Mr. Personality eventually left, and then it was just mad fun. Everyone kind of peeled off around one, but me and Fabio (my friend's German roommate, who's name isn't actually Fabio but I thought it was) hung around for another hour and danced like morons. When we got back to Europahaus, he was like "So, doing anything tomorrow?" I was like "Umm...we're making portuguese cookies. If you want to come?" (Which sounds totally ridiculous but that's what we're doing), but he thought it was awesome and said he'll come. HOORAY! New friends!!
Okay, so something interesting that happened tonight: we were all dancing in a circle, and this random kid with a mohawk (me and mohawks :/) came up and started talking to me. He asked me where I was from, and when I said Amerika he completely stopped and said "America? Really? America? You're American?" And the conversation went from there. That's when I realized that maybe being an American in Germany isn't totally awful. America is such a huge presence in the world, but most of the Germans I've talked to really haven't met many real-live normal Americans. It's not like being from Europe, where all the countries are so close together and students studying abroad is normal. America is a giant political/cultural/linguistic machine, but there's not that many of us representing. So being American is something of a conversation starter, even if it subjects you to intense interrogation about where exactly you're from, which big cities are nearby, where the interrogator's friends/neighbors/third cousin twice removed on the mother's side have visited, and whether you're for Hilary or Obama and why.
New policy, in addition to Just Say Ja, is hereby christened Embracing The Differentness, and Thereby The Inherent Awesomeness.
15 April 2008
"So...you're a Jersey Girl, huh?" and other short stories
Sungmi and I went back to Sankt Gallin yesterday to see Hamlet, which wound up being alot of fun. We got tickets to the art museum, then snuck into the nature museum and took pictures with all the taxidermified animals. The play itself was in German (sweet), and was like 80's techno-fied, with everyone wearing trenchcoats and carrying guns. The stage was also at like a 70 degree angle, and at the end of the play, all the 80's gold curtains in the background starting blowing and all the actors fought their way against the fake wind for like 10 minutes. Which I really didn't understand and which I'm pretty sure wasn't in the original.
On the way back I made friends with 2 random African dudes until Sungmi pulled me away and said I shouldn't talk to strangers. Then, after we got back to Konstanz, we got stopped by a group of German boys, who asked us if we knew of any bars in the area. I repeated the question to Sungmi in English, and all of a sudden the boys got super excited and Lead Boy said"You speak English?" "Yeah." Where are you from?" "New Jersey." At this, Lead Boy took a step back, looked me up and down for like thirty seconds, and said "So... you're a Jersey Girl, huh?" I don't know how people in Germany became acquainted with Jersey Girls, or what stereotypes the label implies here, but I do know that Lead Boy was looking way too excited for his own good. So I got out of that one real fast.
______________________________________________________________
There have been alot of banging noises coming from Chinese roommate's room the last three nights (and just for the record, I know for a fact she's in there alone.) Yesterday German Girl Roommate and I sat downstairs for like a hour brainstorming what on earth the noises are and why on earth CR is making them. This is how the conversation went:
GGR: Maybe she's building a table.
Me: Maybe she's building a pirate ship.
GGR: Maybe she's building a really BIG table.
Me: Maybe she's digging a tunnel.
GGR: To CHINA!
So it's settled by popular vote. CR is currently working on a tunnel back to the motherland, and with the amount of effort that's emanating in sound waves from her room, I expect it should be done in a few days.
_____________________________________________________________
A little bit of background: GGR, before she started school, backpacked Australia for six months. She's madly in love with the country, her boyfriend is Australian, and every shirt she owns has Australia, Sydney or a kangaroo on it. Basically, she's in the process of converting from German to Aussie.
Transformation complete? Today I walked downstairs to find her making a Vegemite sandwich, at which I promptly dropped everything I was carrying (my laundry) and yelled "Vegemite!" Because I'd never actually seen the stuff before, but here was GGR, slathering it all over two pieces of bread. She let me try some, and just for the record, it's disgusting. It's beyond disgusting. If everything disgusting in the world had a contest for the world title, Vegemite would beat out McDonalds, Burger King, and vegan food hands down. GGR laughed at my mad dash to spit it out, shrugged and said "More for me." And threw some more on her toast. It seems a bit strange to me, in retrospect, that my vegemite virginity got taken out in Germany of all places, but these things happen I guess.
______________________________________________________________
Today I went to the student riding hour at the local barn, and guess what! I'M RIDING NEXT MONDAY! Jaysus Christ Mary and Joseph I am GETTING ON A HORSE! Hooray! I am SO excited! But so anyway, today as we were all sitting around hanging out, one of the girls on the equestrian team came up to me and said "Do you want to come blah-blah-blah with us?" Except I didn't know what she was asking. In the past, it has proven wiser to clarify the question first, but in this case I figured I could just apply Just Say Ja wisdom and just agree to come along. So I did. I followed her into the ring, and that's when I met Franz Ferdinand, the giant vaulting horse. Because apparently we were vaulting.
For those of you who have never seen vaulting (horse vaulting), it's basically gymnastics on horseback (go look it up on youtube). People get up there and do all sorts of funky tricks while the horse is cantering around in a giant circle, but let's clarify something: Tina rides horses. Tina does not do cartwheels on them. But Tina tried anyway, and because the real horse was sick, we used Franz Ferdinand the wooden horse. It was hard, but fun. I didn't do cartwheels, but I did do some pretty kickass handstands, and next week when the horse is better, I'll get to try it on a real, live, breathing, and hopefully standing-still horse. See? One more example of Just Say Ja policy working out to cool ends.
_______________________________________________________________
first class tomorrow, will let you know how that goes. adios!
13 April 2008
Just Say "Ja"
I have some advice for everybody who may ever go abroad/learn another language. Whenever anybody approaches you with a question/suggestion, think of me and just say "Ja." I have found that by just saying yes to everything, I've met/seen/been some pretty kickass people/things/places.
Note: The only thing you do not say "Ja" to is fifteen year olds trying to pay you for sex. Because I know that was the first thing you all thought of.
Examples of things you say "Ja" to: Tina, want to try this crazy German food that looks gross and probably tastes worse? Ja. Tina, want to go to Munich this weekend? We're leaving tomorrow. Ja. Tina, want to come to this equestrian team dinner party? Actually, I don't. What I want to do is stay home and do laundry and take a shower so that I'll be clean to go to Switzerland tomorrow. But "Just Say 'Ja'" policy dictates that I say "Ja," so, Ja. Whatever. Alright.
So I went, and I'm glad I did, because it was AWESOME. I only meant to stay for an hour and I wound up not leaving until almost midnight. The more I keep showing up, the nicer people are. Plus I learn some really interesting new words, like tonight I got specifically sat down and taught the various slang words for "sex" and "blowjob." Lovely. And no, I'm not filling you in. This story ends here. From here on out, I have no idea what you're talking about.
But what I found vaguely entertaining is how once you get alchohol into people, then they correct your German. Like tonight, I said something, and one girl said to me "What do you think that means? Because I don't think it means quite what you think it does." Are you kidding me? I've been in this country a month and I just get informed of this now? So basically, I've been making a fool out of myself for a month and nobody's set me straight until today. But gracias.
One kid also insisted on practicing his English with me, and he was trying to describe an "unfortunate condition" to me, but didn't know what it was called in English, and this is how the conversation went:
"Wait, what's the word? What's the word in English that I'm looking for?"
"Sober."
"Sober! Can you spell it?"
"S-O-B-E-R."
"Ahh! Sober! Sober! Sober!"
*random other girl*: "Speak to her in German!"
"I'm practicing my English, and I just learned a new word: sober!"
"Sober? What the hell does that mean?"
Can we discuss a little bit how I taught intoxicated Germans the English word 'sober'? Is nobody else struck by the irony and hilarity of this situation?
I love Germany!
Some added advice for anybody who may be studying abroad/learning another language: Do not bike home in the dark without a bike lamp and with any amount of alcohol in your system. This is not a good idea. That makes two things you shouldn't say "Ja," to, but only two things.
Note: The only thing you do not say "Ja" to is fifteen year olds trying to pay you for sex. Because I know that was the first thing you all thought of.
Examples of things you say "Ja" to: Tina, want to try this crazy German food that looks gross and probably tastes worse? Ja. Tina, want to go to Munich this weekend? We're leaving tomorrow. Ja. Tina, want to come to this equestrian team dinner party? Actually, I don't. What I want to do is stay home and do laundry and take a shower so that I'll be clean to go to Switzerland tomorrow. But "Just Say 'Ja'" policy dictates that I say "Ja," so, Ja. Whatever. Alright.
So I went, and I'm glad I did, because it was AWESOME. I only meant to stay for an hour and I wound up not leaving until almost midnight. The more I keep showing up, the nicer people are. Plus I learn some really interesting new words, like tonight I got specifically sat down and taught the various slang words for "sex" and "blowjob." Lovely. And no, I'm not filling you in. This story ends here. From here on out, I have no idea what you're talking about.
But what I found vaguely entertaining is how once you get alchohol into people, then they correct your German. Like tonight, I said something, and one girl said to me "What do you think that means? Because I don't think it means quite what you think it does." Are you kidding me? I've been in this country a month and I just get informed of this now? So basically, I've been making a fool out of myself for a month and nobody's set me straight until today. But gracias.
One kid also insisted on practicing his English with me, and he was trying to describe an "unfortunate condition" to me, but didn't know what it was called in English, and this is how the conversation went:
"Wait, what's the word? What's the word in English that I'm looking for?"
"Sober."
"Sober! Can you spell it?"
"S-O-B-E-R."
"Ahh! Sober! Sober! Sober!"
*random other girl*: "Speak to her in German!"
"I'm practicing my English, and I just learned a new word: sober!"
"Sober? What the hell does that mean?"
Can we discuss a little bit how I taught intoxicated Germans the English word 'sober'? Is nobody else struck by the irony and hilarity of this situation?
I love Germany!
Some added advice for anybody who may be studying abroad/learning another language: Do not bike home in the dark without a bike lamp and with any amount of alcohol in your system. This is not a good idea. That makes two things you shouldn't say "Ja," to, but only two things.
12 April 2008
Mittelalterlicher Markt, Mohawks and Mix-Ups
Today we all went to Radolfzell for the Mittelalterlicher Markt (The middle ages market). If you can imagine it, picture Renaissance Faire meets church flea market meets punk rock emo wrist-cutting concert. If all three of these things could get together and having babies, their spawn would be a German attempt at a period market with bad dancing.
So minus the sad lack of dancing skills, it was actually quite fun. Everyone was dressed in very creative costumes; one kid had furs on (read: a dead fox slung over his shoulder. Which technically constitutes as having furs on, but still, it was a fox. A dead one. And it was staring at me.), and one kid had a really kickass pirate hat that I was jealous of. I made friends with the sword people and with the almond selling lady, and tried to make friends with Really Cute German Dude With Mohawk, but was unsuccessful. Other than not, not much really happened. People kept asking us where we were from, and then practicing their English on us which was funny for like a minute and then was just annoying.
Equestrian team party in like an hour, and then Sankt Gallin (again) tomorrow to see Hamlet (WOOT!) Not sure if it's in German (I hope it is), and sorry for the weird language mix last post, I blame 3 straight hours of actively speaking German and then coming home and trying to write in English. Sorries. Better luck next time.
OH! PS! I got asked if I was British?
Spanish Count: 10
Italian Count: 1
British Count: 1
So minus the sad lack of dancing skills, it was actually quite fun. Everyone was dressed in very creative costumes; one kid had furs on (read: a dead fox slung over his shoulder. Which technically constitutes as having furs on, but still, it was a fox. A dead one. And it was staring at me.), and one kid had a really kickass pirate hat that I was jealous of. I made friends with the sword people and with the almond selling lady, and tried to make friends with Really Cute German Dude With Mohawk, but was unsuccessful. Other than not, not much really happened. People kept asking us where we were from, and then practicing their English on us which was funny for like a minute and then was just annoying.
Equestrian team party in like an hour, and then Sankt Gallin (again) tomorrow to see Hamlet (WOOT!) Not sure if it's in German (I hope it is), and sorry for the weird language mix last post, I blame 3 straight hours of actively speaking German and then coming home and trying to write in English. Sorries. Better luck next time.
OH! PS! I got asked if I was British?
Spanish Count: 10
Italian Count: 1
British Count: 1
11 April 2008
Tina's Patented Friend-Making Skills (tm)
Kreuzlingen SUCKED. It was so wie Konstanz, aber kleiner, dirtier, and Swiss. Auch war ich ganz allein, weil alle meine Freunden backed out because of the weather, because they're lame. Trotz des Wetters, I decided to go anyway, but I just kind of vaguely sauntered up and down the main street (and it wasn't even RAINING) for like 20 minutes, looking for something cool (which there wasn't). I found a gift shop, but it turned out to be some strange middle-eastern place, and when I saw the belly dancing gold sequined bras, I was so out of there. And if anybody from Philly makes a crack about that, I will personally see to it that you get beat. In short, Tina was in Switzerland for a grand total of 23 Minuten before she got completely fed up with the place and crossed back over the border.
Meine Passpartnerin Maggie invited me to her birthday party, so ich hab for the last 3 Stunden Deutsch gesprochen. And with Tina's Patented Friend-Making Skills (tm), I went in there knowing nobody and came out with 2 new Italian friends and 2 deutsche Freunden. Also, my Italian friends hab mir gesagt, dass ich schon gut deutsch kann, so take that Psycho Bitch of a German Teacher. I think my German is better als a month ago, but I'm starting to have a really hard time distinguishing between what I understand in conversations, and what I pretend I understand. (And I know that sounds ridiculous but that's the way it is.) On another more random note, the one italian friend also told me that if he hadn't heard my accent in German, he would have assumed I was Italian, because I look it. Spanish Count: 10. Italian Count: 1. Portuguese Count: 0.
And die Welt ist klein, weil my new Italian Freund was roommates with my German boy roommate (Newest Roommate). And other Italian friend knows one of the girls from Rutgers who studied abroad here last spring. Crazyness!
We were supposed to go to Heidelberg tomorrow, but all my friends decided to be lame again and back out because it's supposed to rain. I'd go by myself, but it's like 100 Euro, und mit dem "Schoenes Wochenede" Ticket kostet es nur 27 Euro fuer fuenf Leute. Oh wells. Morgen we have to think of something interesting to do, or I'll be hardcore mad.
Anyway, adios amigos!
P.s HAPPY BIRTHDAY JEN!! Go home and get your present wench, it's mad sweet!
Meine Passpartnerin Maggie invited me to her birthday party, so ich hab for the last 3 Stunden Deutsch gesprochen. And with Tina's Patented Friend-Making Skills (tm), I went in there knowing nobody and came out with 2 new Italian friends and 2 deutsche Freunden. Also, my Italian friends hab mir gesagt, dass ich schon gut deutsch kann, so take that Psycho Bitch of a German Teacher. I think my German is better als a month ago, but I'm starting to have a really hard time distinguishing between what I understand in conversations, and what I pretend I understand. (And I know that sounds ridiculous but that's the way it is.) On another more random note, the one italian friend also told me that if he hadn't heard my accent in German, he would have assumed I was Italian, because I look it. Spanish Count: 10. Italian Count: 1. Portuguese Count: 0.
And die Welt ist klein, weil my new Italian Freund was roommates with my German boy roommate (Newest Roommate). And other Italian friend knows one of the girls from Rutgers who studied abroad here last spring. Crazyness!
We were supposed to go to Heidelberg tomorrow, but all my friends decided to be lame again and back out because it's supposed to rain. I'd go by myself, but it's like 100 Euro, und mit dem "Schoenes Wochenede" Ticket kostet es nur 27 Euro fuer fuenf Leute. Oh wells. Morgen we have to think of something interesting to do, or I'll be hardcore mad.
Anyway, adios amigos!
P.s HAPPY BIRTHDAY JEN!! Go home and get your present wench, it's mad sweet!
09 April 2008
my wallet got turned in!
Hooray!!
Dear jackass who stole my money,
Thanks for shamelessly taking 100 Euros from a broke student. 100 Euros! That's like $160!! But thanks for pretending to be a halfway decent person by turning in everything that wasn't of use to you.
They even took the three swiss fracs I had in there. Seriously? Was that necessary? I kind of hate you, whoever you are. But at least I got all my cards and stuff back, which saves me an infinite amount of time and hassle. The guy at the Fundbuero said normally people turn things in in person, and leave their name and number, but whoever turned my wallet in just shoved it in the mailbox. Because you don't leave your name and number after you take a hundred euros out. And Commerce won't reactivate my debit card and is being completely blockheaded about sending me a new one. I've got an idea, Commerce. Shut up, stop referring to me as "an extraordinary and unusual circumstance" and send me a debit card. Gracias.
So minus this both good and retarded turn of events, I had a pretty good Tuesday yesterday. It was New Hungarian Friend's birthday, so we all went out and I spent like an hour talking with Bald German Dude and Romanian friend about lots of fun things. Bald German Dude told me I have a very strong American accent when I speak English (woot? crap?) and Romanian friend without meaning to completly cleared up Konjunktiv II for me.
For those of you who haven't suffered the endless, boundless joys of learning the subjunctive II in German, it's one of those really lovely parts of the language that makes you want to put a subjunctively conjugated knife through your eye. And Psycho Bitch of a German Teacher was completely unabashed with her horror at my inability to grasp it. But last night while Romanian Friend, Bald German Dude, and I were having a conversation about how German was a hard language to learn, Romanian Friend said simply "You know what I find really hard? Konjunktiv II, where you're in the past tense but talking about the future. Like 'If such and such had occured, than such and such would happen.'"
Ooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. That's what that is? *pulls subjunctively conjugated knife out of eye*
Kreuzlingen tomorrow (didn't make it there the other day), and Medieval Market this Saturday? Where does Germany come up with these things? At any rate, good stories should come about.
Adios!
Dear jackass who stole my money,
Thanks for shamelessly taking 100 Euros from a broke student. 100 Euros! That's like $160!! But thanks for pretending to be a halfway decent person by turning in everything that wasn't of use to you.
They even took the three swiss fracs I had in there. Seriously? Was that necessary? I kind of hate you, whoever you are. But at least I got all my cards and stuff back, which saves me an infinite amount of time and hassle. The guy at the Fundbuero said normally people turn things in in person, and leave their name and number, but whoever turned my wallet in just shoved it in the mailbox. Because you don't leave your name and number after you take a hundred euros out. And Commerce won't reactivate my debit card and is being completely blockheaded about sending me a new one. I've got an idea, Commerce. Shut up, stop referring to me as "an extraordinary and unusual circumstance" and send me a debit card. Gracias.
So minus this both good and retarded turn of events, I had a pretty good Tuesday yesterday. It was New Hungarian Friend's birthday, so we all went out and I spent like an hour talking with Bald German Dude and Romanian friend about lots of fun things. Bald German Dude told me I have a very strong American accent when I speak English (woot? crap?) and Romanian friend without meaning to completly cleared up Konjunktiv II for me.
For those of you who haven't suffered the endless, boundless joys of learning the subjunctive II in German, it's one of those really lovely parts of the language that makes you want to put a subjunctively conjugated knife through your eye. And Psycho Bitch of a German Teacher was completely unabashed with her horror at my inability to grasp it. But last night while Romanian Friend, Bald German Dude, and I were having a conversation about how German was a hard language to learn, Romanian Friend said simply "You know what I find really hard? Konjunktiv II, where you're in the past tense but talking about the future. Like 'If such and such had occured, than such and such would happen.'"
Ooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. That's what that is? *pulls subjunctively conjugated knife out of eye*
Kreuzlingen tomorrow (didn't make it there the other day), and Medieval Market this Saturday? Where does Germany come up with these things? At any rate, good stories should come about.
Adios!
08 April 2008
Switzerland on Sundays
Switzerland!! Not that clean and their German is so retarded and dialect-ed, my roommate rants that it's not even German, and now I know what he means. They're completely unintelligible. But on Sunday we decided to go to Switzerland anyway (because there's nothing else to do on a sunday) and see the opera Carmen. Except nobody told us that it would be entirely in french without german subtitles. So needless to say, we were more than a little lost, and I was doubly confused because my only exposure to Carmen has been the Hey Arnold version I saw in like, fifth grade. Who else remembers that? Here it is:
It was pretty sweet, we ran around Sankt Gallin, and I saw a Mexican restaraunt named US-Mex, which made me laugh for a long time but nobody else got it. Also I made everyone go to Starbucks because I miss caramel apple ciders. Except stupid Switzerland doesn't have those. So I got a vanilla bean frappucino but stupid switzerland doesn't have those either, so I just got a vanilla one. Not bad, but not like Grandma Starbucks back home makes.
Probably the best part of the day though was when we found this big Stadtlounge thing, and normally it's like an outdoor bar/restauraunt/socializing place. But with the crappy weather, it was just a bunch of red astroturf benches and tables which we ran around like fools on:
it was a pretty fun time. other than that, nothing interesting has happened. German horse show was wet, cold, rainy, and not that much fun, but I learned alot. Like how European riders are not always better.
Meeting Marina and her little sister (who's visiting) for breakfast, going to the police station (because there are no good samaritans in germany), and then going (back) to switzerland. there's apparently a giant chocolate factory in Kreuzlingen, which we're going to check out. will let you know how that goes!
adios!
It was pretty sweet, we ran around Sankt Gallin, and I saw a Mexican restaraunt named US-Mex, which made me laugh for a long time but nobody else got it. Also I made everyone go to Starbucks because I miss caramel apple ciders. Except stupid Switzerland doesn't have those. So I got a vanilla bean frappucino but stupid switzerland doesn't have those either, so I just got a vanilla one. Not bad, but not like Grandma Starbucks back home makes.
Probably the best part of the day though was when we found this big Stadtlounge thing, and normally it's like an outdoor bar/restauraunt/socializing place. But with the crappy weather, it was just a bunch of red astroturf benches and tables which we ran around like fools on:
it was a pretty fun time. other than that, nothing interesting has happened. German horse show was wet, cold, rainy, and not that much fun, but I learned alot. Like how European riders are not always better.
Meeting Marina and her little sister (who's visiting) for breakfast, going to the police station (because there are no good samaritans in germany), and then going (back) to switzerland. there's apparently a giant chocolate factory in Kreuzlingen, which we're going to check out. will let you know how that goes!
adios!
05 April 2008
The Second Worst Thing That Could Happen to a Foreigner
1) Dying
2) Losing Your Wallet
There goes 100 Euros, my 36 Euro Buskarte, my Rutgers ID, my Uni Konstanz ID, my driver's license, my AAA card, my health insurance card, my debit card, and my USEF card. Not to mention a whole lot of other shite AND my Blockbuster movie rental card. Fucking Hell.
Whereas normal people go do fun things on Friday nights, mine was split between talking on the phone with Commerce trying to convince them that yes, they should send me another debit card, and no I'm not in America, and running around on my bike looking for the police station. Then I had to stand outside awkwardly, get buzzed in through the door after convincing some random Disembodied Voice that I should be let in because I'm foreign, and then talk to a giant police woman, who was quite nice but who had such a thick obnoxious Konstanz accent I had to work extra hard to understand her. As far as I can tell, I have to go to the Fundbuero on Monday to see if any good Samaritan turned in my wallet (it had a hundred Euros in it--it's not getting turned in.), then go back to the police station on Tuesday after my soul has been crushed by the lack of good Samaritans to meet with the same chick I did today to figure out what to do about the German crap that I lost. Also on Monday I have to call the US Consulate in Frankfurt to figure out what to do about the american crap I lost.
Dear God,
If you could get Comcast or whatever so you could stop fucking with my life for kicks, that would be awesome. And if you could magically provide some raspberry iced tea to make me feel better in the meantime, that would be even cooler.
Complete and Total Lack of Love,
Tina
2) Losing Your Wallet
There goes 100 Euros, my 36 Euro Buskarte, my Rutgers ID, my Uni Konstanz ID, my driver's license, my AAA card, my health insurance card, my debit card, and my USEF card. Not to mention a whole lot of other shite AND my Blockbuster movie rental card. Fucking Hell.
Whereas normal people go do fun things on Friday nights, mine was split between talking on the phone with Commerce trying to convince them that yes, they should send me another debit card, and no I'm not in America, and running around on my bike looking for the police station. Then I had to stand outside awkwardly, get buzzed in through the door after convincing some random Disembodied Voice that I should be let in because I'm foreign, and then talk to a giant police woman, who was quite nice but who had such a thick obnoxious Konstanz accent I had to work extra hard to understand her. As far as I can tell, I have to go to the Fundbuero on Monday to see if any good Samaritan turned in my wallet (it had a hundred Euros in it--it's not getting turned in.), then go back to the police station on Tuesday after my soul has been crushed by the lack of good Samaritans to meet with the same chick I did today to figure out what to do about the German crap that I lost. Also on Monday I have to call the US Consulate in Frankfurt to figure out what to do about the american crap I lost.
Dear God,
If you could get Comcast or whatever so you could stop fucking with my life for kicks, that would be awesome. And if you could magically provide some raspberry iced tea to make me feel better in the meantime, that would be even cooler.
Complete and Total Lack of Love,
Tina
04 April 2008
Newest Roommate--I'll come up with new names for these people soon, I promise
German boy moved in! The first time I met him, we shook hands. The second time I met him, he yelled at me for disturbing his studying. Hopefully he's just wound up and stressed because he has a big test tomorrow? Please please please. Also he stutters, and if you've never heard German being stuttered, it's kind of adorable.
Each WG is supposed to be 2 boys and 2 girls, one foreign and one German of each gender. Ours was apparently a little mixed up, seeing as both the boys were German, and both the girls were foreign. When Old Roomate That I Loved left, we got New Roommate, the German girl, but still had 2 the foreign girls (me and Newer Roommate). So basically, there's three of us, and one of him. Sorry, Newest Roommate.
What this translates to, in short order, is that to keep the balance, I should have been a man.
Each WG is supposed to be 2 boys and 2 girls, one foreign and one German of each gender. Ours was apparently a little mixed up, seeing as both the boys were German, and both the girls were foreign. When Old Roomate That I Loved left, we got New Roommate, the German girl, but still had 2 the foreign girls (me and Newer Roommate). So basically, there's three of us, and one of him. Sorry, Newest Roommate.
What this translates to, in short order, is that to keep the balance, I should have been a man.
03 April 2008
Tina Meets The Equestrian Team
Fasten your seatbelts kiddies, Tina has alot to say on this topic.
Okay! So! I found a sign in the Uni that equestrian team has Stammtisch every Tuesday night, which is kind of like a get together and chill and talk about everything sort of event. So I decided to go, because, you know, I like, like horses a little bit, or whatever. Except I got there like 10 minutes early, and discovered I was faced with the daunting task of sitting alone at a massive empty table in a crowded restauraunt waiting for a bunch of German-speaking strangers to show up. So, in classic Tina fashion, I hid in the bathroom. When I finally reemerged (can we talk about how difficult this was? I was so anxious and upset I almost left the restaurant) there were people sitting at the giant table, so I went up and asked if this was the horse back riding table, and was met with a bunch of blank stares. "Reiten?" I said, "reiten?" One of the girls turned to another and said "I totally can't understand her." I repeated it a couple more times, until one of the guys was finally like..."Oh...Reiten?" Minus the fact that that's totally what I said, "Ja." Congratulations me! I found them.
I just kind of sat in silence for awhile until a bunch more people showed up, and then I got to talk to people. Turns out the equestrian team is not a group of American-eating monsters as had previously been thought, but rather a group of really really really nice people who speak really really really fast, notice you're totally lost, and then explain things slowly. Heart. One of the guys had studied in New Jersey actually, and said "If you want, we can speak English." And I was like "Hells no," except not in English and not quite that exact expression. But you get my meaning. Turns out I'm the second foreigner they've had (and the only one now), and guess where the other foreigner was from? Portugal. Because we're awesome.
As far as I can understand, they ride once a week and horseshow against other schools in much the same fashion as we do in the IHSA, which is to say, showing up and having to ride strange horses. BUT, their horseshows are three days long, Friday=Party, Saturday=Dressage, Sunday=Show-Jumping (real! showjumping), and you have to do all three. Tina showing dressage? Oh goodness. And when I say show-jumping, I mean they do everything from baby stuff to almost-Grand-Prix, which is inTENSE yo. And terrifying. And probably the death toll for Americans is high.
However, I am way excited, and somehow got coerced into going to a show (a real one, not a student one) this weekend, to help and stuff.
Now for some numbers:
Number of straight men of the equestrian team people I've met so far: 5
Number of straight men on the rutgers equestrian team: 1 (debateable)
"Are-you-Spanish?" count: now 10
Number of times I was really confused and lost: about 8 million
Number of times someone said my German was decent: 4 (Take that Psycho Bitch of a German Teacher. If I could punch you for every time I make myself understood, your face would look worse than mine when I crash-landed into a curb. In fact, you probably wouldn't have a face.)
Number of items I want to add to the list of things I would like someone to send me: 5 (Swiss Miss hot chocolate that I don't have to add sugar to, frosted flakes, aunt jemima maple syrup, soft pretzels and lemonade--thanks!)
I met up with the team again today at a bar, and I've pretty much come to the conclusion that my soul has been eaten, and this is going to be pretty sweet. But I feel inifinitely better than I did a few days ago; I think my mom's right, this is about the point in time where I reach the end of my rope and go a little crazy from the distinct lack of horse-ness. But this weekend is horseshow and Monday I go to the barn! WOOT! Now if only aikido would start (JESUS CHRIST, JUST START ALREADY) and then life would finally be perfect.
In other news, Sungmi and I were shopping yesterday, wound up in a toy store, and bought kites. It was mad fun, flying kites (which in German is almost identical to the word for dragon-- which will entertain me alot when I go back tomorrow and ask for a dragon kite.)
EDIT!
So I just realized I never put up pictures of my room! Here they are:
This is my room (sorry it's messy)
This is as far as my collage has gotten in a month. By the end of this semester, the entire room should be covered.
These are the uniquitous paper cranes I hang everywhere. Unfortunately (as I realized after I'd put them all up), it's a little bit difficult for people taller than me (namely: everyone) to come into my room, as they tend to frequently take paper birds in the face.
And this is our downstairs living room/kitchen. The pantry, storage room, shower room and toilet room I didn't bother taking pictures of, but the orange door is New Roommate's, and there's another door beside it that's Newer Roommate's. Roommate We Have Yet To See Who Is Also Unfortunately The Only Boy lives next to me.
Okay, now I'm out! Adios everyone.
Okay! So! I found a sign in the Uni that equestrian team has Stammtisch every Tuesday night, which is kind of like a get together and chill and talk about everything sort of event. So I decided to go, because, you know, I like, like horses a little bit, or whatever. Except I got there like 10 minutes early, and discovered I was faced with the daunting task of sitting alone at a massive empty table in a crowded restauraunt waiting for a bunch of German-speaking strangers to show up. So, in classic Tina fashion, I hid in the bathroom. When I finally reemerged (can we talk about how difficult this was? I was so anxious and upset I almost left the restaurant) there were people sitting at the giant table, so I went up and asked if this was the horse back riding table, and was met with a bunch of blank stares. "Reiten?" I said, "reiten?" One of the girls turned to another and said "I totally can't understand her." I repeated it a couple more times, until one of the guys was finally like..."Oh...Reiten?" Minus the fact that that's totally what I said, "Ja." Congratulations me! I found them.
I just kind of sat in silence for awhile until a bunch more people showed up, and then I got to talk to people. Turns out the equestrian team is not a group of American-eating monsters as had previously been thought, but rather a group of really really really nice people who speak really really really fast, notice you're totally lost, and then explain things slowly. Heart. One of the guys had studied in New Jersey actually, and said "If you want, we can speak English." And I was like "Hells no," except not in English and not quite that exact expression. But you get my meaning. Turns out I'm the second foreigner they've had (and the only one now), and guess where the other foreigner was from? Portugal. Because we're awesome.
As far as I can understand, they ride once a week and horseshow against other schools in much the same fashion as we do in the IHSA, which is to say, showing up and having to ride strange horses. BUT, their horseshows are three days long, Friday=Party, Saturday=Dressage, Sunday=Show-Jumping (real! showjumping), and you have to do all three. Tina showing dressage? Oh goodness. And when I say show-jumping, I mean they do everything from baby stuff to almost-Grand-Prix, which is inTENSE yo. And terrifying. And probably the death toll for Americans is high.
However, I am way excited, and somehow got coerced into going to a show (a real one, not a student one) this weekend, to help and stuff.
Now for some numbers:
Number of straight men of the equestrian team people I've met so far: 5
Number of straight men on the rutgers equestrian team: 1 (debateable)
"Are-you-Spanish?" count: now 10
Number of times I was really confused and lost: about 8 million
Number of times someone said my German was decent: 4 (Take that Psycho Bitch of a German Teacher. If I could punch you for every time I make myself understood, your face would look worse than mine when I crash-landed into a curb. In fact, you probably wouldn't have a face.)
Number of items I want to add to the list of things I would like someone to send me: 5 (Swiss Miss hot chocolate that I don't have to add sugar to, frosted flakes, aunt jemima maple syrup, soft pretzels and lemonade--thanks!)
I met up with the team again today at a bar, and I've pretty much come to the conclusion that my soul has been eaten, and this is going to be pretty sweet. But I feel inifinitely better than I did a few days ago; I think my mom's right, this is about the point in time where I reach the end of my rope and go a little crazy from the distinct lack of horse-ness. But this weekend is horseshow and Monday I go to the barn! WOOT! Now if only aikido would start (JESUS CHRIST, JUST START ALREADY) and then life would finally be perfect.
In other news, Sungmi and I were shopping yesterday, wound up in a toy store, and bought kites. It was mad fun, flying kites (which in German is almost identical to the word for dragon-- which will entertain me alot when I go back tomorrow and ask for a dragon kite.)
EDIT!
So I just realized I never put up pictures of my room! Here they are:
This is my room (sorry it's messy)
This is as far as my collage has gotten in a month. By the end of this semester, the entire room should be covered.
These are the uniquitous paper cranes I hang everywhere. Unfortunately (as I realized after I'd put them all up), it's a little bit difficult for people taller than me (namely: everyone) to come into my room, as they tend to frequently take paper birds in the face.
And this is our downstairs living room/kitchen. The pantry, storage room, shower room and toilet room I didn't bother taking pictures of, but the orange door is New Roommate's, and there's another door beside it that's Newer Roommate's. Roommate We Have Yet To See Who Is Also Unfortunately The Only Boy lives next to me.
Okay, now I'm out! Adios everyone.
01 April 2008
Bad Pickup Lines, Breakfast, and Newer Roommates
Sorry for the two-posts-one-day thing, but I have a story!
So this morning I got up early to go to the Uni, pick up my scholarship money, and get my Studentausweis-ID card thing. I got to the office, handed them my slip, and asked for my card, but they told me they couldn't find it. So then I got sent to this random lady in another office who asked what my last name was. I told her, she circled it on the paper, and sent me back with instructions to tell them that my last name was actually my last name. So apparently they'd been searching for my first name as my last name...because that makes all sorts of sense. Except it still wasn't coming up, and the lady said "We've been searching by birthday and we've got nothing." I pointed out that in the US 3-12-88, is March 12th, not December 3rd, and then they were able to find it. Glad I got that one all cleared up.
On the way out to the bus I stopped in the bathroom really fast, and guess what! My black eye is pretty much gone, you really can't tell. Woot! Except on the bus this random dude turned around and said (quite simply) "Do you have a black eye?" So much for that...self confidence points: -5. "Yeah," I said. "I fell off my bike." Random Dude laughed and said "Because it totally looks like someone punched you." Thanks. Then he said "How old are you?" I said 20, asked how old he was, and he responded "Oh, I'm too old for you." Newsflash Mr. Smooth Talker, your pick-up lines SUCK.
So I spent the next twenty minutes of my life debating with Mr. Smooth Talker various images of the US and the merits of Obama versus Clinton (in German), and at the end of our conversation after he was getting off the bus, he said "wow, I'm surprised, you speak good german." HAH. What now, Psycho Bitch of a German Teacher? Take THAT. Self confidence points: +9999999999.
When I got back to my WG I decided to organize a big American Breakfast Party. Me, Sungmi, Marina and New Roommate cooked up an obscene amount of pancakes, eggs and bacon (the latter of which Sungmi did entirely by herself with nothing but chopsticks, and I was duly impressed). It was a pretty sweet breakfast. Right as we were sitting down to eat, the door opened and in walked Newer Roommate who we were not expecting and who was obviously not expecting to see all of us. We all just kind of stared at each other for like a minute until Tina (in all her overarching wit and tact) picked up a frying pan and said "Umm...do you like, want breakfast?" And that's how we met Newer Roommate.
Newer Roommate is Chinese and really really chill. She and Sungmi immediately bonded over their Asian-ness, and then we all bonded over a half-hour discussion over which animals we want to sneak into our WGs. I'm all for a pony, but I think Newer Roommate is thinking more along the lines of reptiles. At any rate, it's a gorgeous day, the Uni just gave me money, and I'm gone. Until next time kiddies! Tina over and out.
p.s. HAPPY BIRTHDAY CAITLIN! I'm sending you a present, I just need your address!
So this morning I got up early to go to the Uni, pick up my scholarship money, and get my Studentausweis-ID card thing. I got to the office, handed them my slip, and asked for my card, but they told me they couldn't find it. So then I got sent to this random lady in another office who asked what my last name was. I told her, she circled it on the paper, and sent me back with instructions to tell them that my last name was actually my last name. So apparently they'd been searching for my first name as my last name...because that makes all sorts of sense. Except it still wasn't coming up, and the lady said "We've been searching by birthday and we've got nothing." I pointed out that in the US 3-12-88, is March 12th, not December 3rd, and then they were able to find it. Glad I got that one all cleared up.
On the way out to the bus I stopped in the bathroom really fast, and guess what! My black eye is pretty much gone, you really can't tell. Woot! Except on the bus this random dude turned around and said (quite simply) "Do you have a black eye?" So much for that...self confidence points: -5. "Yeah," I said. "I fell off my bike." Random Dude laughed and said "Because it totally looks like someone punched you." Thanks. Then he said "How old are you?" I said 20, asked how old he was, and he responded "Oh, I'm too old for you." Newsflash Mr. Smooth Talker, your pick-up lines SUCK.
So I spent the next twenty minutes of my life debating with Mr. Smooth Talker various images of the US and the merits of Obama versus Clinton (in German), and at the end of our conversation after he was getting off the bus, he said "wow, I'm surprised, you speak good german." HAH. What now, Psycho Bitch of a German Teacher? Take THAT. Self confidence points: +9999999999.
When I got back to my WG I decided to organize a big American Breakfast Party. Me, Sungmi, Marina and New Roommate cooked up an obscene amount of pancakes, eggs and bacon (the latter of which Sungmi did entirely by herself with nothing but chopsticks, and I was duly impressed). It was a pretty sweet breakfast. Right as we were sitting down to eat, the door opened and in walked Newer Roommate who we were not expecting and who was obviously not expecting to see all of us. We all just kind of stared at each other for like a minute until Tina (in all her overarching wit and tact) picked up a frying pan and said "Umm...do you like, want breakfast?" And that's how we met Newer Roommate.
Newer Roommate is Chinese and really really chill. She and Sungmi immediately bonded over their Asian-ness, and then we all bonded over a half-hour discussion over which animals we want to sneak into our WGs. I'm all for a pony, but I think Newer Roommate is thinking more along the lines of reptiles. At any rate, it's a gorgeous day, the Uni just gave me money, and I'm gone. Until next time kiddies! Tina over and out.
p.s. HAPPY BIRTHDAY CAITLIN! I'm sending you a present, I just need your address!
chocolate chips.
ovaltine.
real peanut butter.
my straightening iron.
garnier fructus shampoo and conditioner for curly hair.
raspberry iced tea.
bottled still water.
my soft bristled hair brush
snapple.
thick rice cakes.
wheat thins.
goldfish crackers.
real belgian waffles.
stores that stay open past 4.
departments that have the same opening hours every day.
a really really thick blanket.
fluffy bath towels.
cheetos and/or fritos.
crest pro-health toothpaste.
sliced turkey.
american cheese.
wonderbread.
milk in a container big enough to last me more than 3 days.
wawa.
gatorade.
a packet of mechanical pencils.
degree ultra clear.
pre-mixed salad.
italian or bleu cheese dressing already made in a bottle.
DC++.
my car.
campbell's soup.
turkey bacon.
chocolate chip cookies.
clearasil ultra.
a rutgers hoodie.
country music.
my horse.
If somebody who loves me could put these in a box and ship them to me, I would be your best friend forever!
later:
boredom results in terrible things. spare me your sarcasm:
http://tinypic.com/view.php?pic=2vi15it&s=3
real peanut butter.
my straightening iron.
garnier fructus shampoo and conditioner for curly hair.
raspberry iced tea.
bottled still water.
my soft bristled hair brush
snapple.
thick rice cakes.
wheat thins.
goldfish crackers.
real belgian waffles.
stores that stay open past 4.
departments that have the same opening hours every day.
a really really thick blanket.
fluffy bath towels.
cheetos and/or fritos.
crest pro-health toothpaste.
sliced turkey.
american cheese.
wonderbread.
milk in a container big enough to last me more than 3 days.
wawa.
gatorade.
a packet of mechanical pencils.
degree ultra clear.
pre-mixed salad.
italian or bleu cheese dressing already made in a bottle.
DC++.
my car.
campbell's soup.
turkey bacon.
chocolate chip cookies.
clearasil ultra.
a rutgers hoodie.
country music.
my horse.
If somebody who loves me could put these in a box and ship them to me, I would be your best friend forever!
later:
boredom results in terrible things. spare me your sarcasm:
http://tinypic.com/view.php?pic=2vi15it&s=3
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)