29 January 2013

Portuguese Musicals and Mexican Bugs

It all started when I found this video of the Polish cast of Les Miserables flash-mobbing a mall:

Naturally, I posted it on my sister's Facebook wall.  Because Polish sounds funny.

Somehow, this devolved into a conversation in which I posted this song in various languages and we alternatively praised its merits or tore it apart.  The German version, for the record, sounds like shit.  However, all that came to a stop when I found this piece of pricelessness:

Yes, that is correct.  At about the 1:10 mark, a ragtag band of what I can only assume to be tone-deaf  hobos working for bacalhau burst into One More Day on national Portuguese television.  It is both awful and HILARIOUS because, naturally, they do it in English.  My sister pointed out that this is exactly what this song would sound like if we did it at Portuguese-American Thanksgiving.  As a result, two hours of Facebook hilarity ensued, in which we re-wrote Les Mis for a Portuguese audience and cast our extended family it.  

Our version contains numerous future hits: the beautiful "A Pasteis Full of Egg," in which Maria and love interest Manuel fall in love over her good portuguese baking skills, "A Little Fall of Fists," when spurned Inês gets trampled during the soccer brawl scene, the poignant "All My Friends Are Dead," sung by Manuel when being sad about this turn of events, and of course, the rousing "Do You Hear The Porkchops Yell And Throw Things At The Television?" sung by João val João and the entire ensemble while they're attempting to overthrow Ronaldo as the King of Soccer.  Sadly, our version is probably only entertaining if you are both Portuguese and a Les Mis fan, which, according to this handy dandy Venn Diagramm, means...

Nah, let's be honest, this probably isn't funny to anyone that's not me, my sister, and whichever of the bacalhau-eating hobos in the corner over there speak English.

In other news, today my adviser spent a good amount of time telling me all about the times in rural Mexico he ran into bird spiders, black widow spiders, fire ants, baby black widow spiders, flying cockroaches, termites, and ONE TIME, IT WAS HILARIOUS, I WOKE UP WITH SCORPIONS ON MY PILLOW.  

Considers "flying cockroaches" a better excuse to back out of Adventuretime Mexicoland than "drug cartels"?


A cockroach will not fly up my pants.  A cockroach will not fly up my pants.  A cockroach will not fly up my pants.

Mother of God, if a cockroach flies up my pants, I will actually die.


Anonymous said...

That's not Portuguese TV, it is Brazilian TV

Anonymous said...

Flying roaches aren't a big problem. Scorpions on the other hand.....

bevchen said...

Flying cockroaches sound terrifying!!

Anonymous said...

Whatever man, Brazil was Portugal once.