04 July 2008

30 Things I Hate About You

I had a bit of a minor freak out today, because I realized I would be boarding a plane in exactly one month. Therefore, I've decided to write a list of everything I hate about Germany in the hopes that this would make me want to leave. Okay! Here goes:

1) I hate that the mosquitos here are mutant bloodsuckers that attack you during the day, bite you through your clothes, and go for your face.

2) I hate that none of the windows have screens, which means lots and lots of bugs.

3) I hate the labyrinth bureacracy.

4) I hate the lack of air-conditoning.

5) I hate how the peanut butter, syrup, and ketchup taste different.

6) I hate how much more expensive everything is.

7) I hate how there's only three busses that go to Uni.

8) I hate how if you cross the street before the green symbol, you get glares.

9) I hate the constant election coverage.

10) I hate how all the stores close at 4.

11) I hate how unhelpful sales people are.

12) I hate how closed the Germans as a general rule are.

13) I HATE PFAND! Where stores put charge like a 20 cent down payment on bottled drink that you only get back to return the bottle. But seriously, who goes out of their way to return a bottle for 20 cents? No one.

14) I hate how militant the pre-teens are.

15) I hate how gothic and wacked out the regular teens are.

16) I hate how hard it is to find still water.

17) I hate how none of my roommates clean...ever.

18) I hate that you have to smuggle fourth of July fireworks from the Czech Republic.

19) I hate how retarded Switzerland is, because they should just shut up and join the EU.

20) I hate how Germans can't small talk, and only discuss deep topics like politics or the apocalypse. And expect you to join in.

21) I hate how nobody says "How are you?"

22) I hate how everyone presumes to know more about America than I do.

23) I hate how in my Sociology of Scandals class, these kids discuss America like they live there. But they don't. Bite me, I do.

24) I hate how deoderant comes in really tiny bottles.

25) I hate nude beaches.

26) I hate how they don't sell twizzlers. Or goldfish crackers, or wheat thins, or swiss miss hot chocolate.

27) I hate how all the music on the radio is in German, and that all movies/tv shows are originally American but dubbed into German.

28) I hate how the Rhine is STILL COLD.

29) I hate Quark.

30) I hate how nobody tells you ANYTHING. They expect you to know, and if you don't know, they expect you to ask. But if you're American, and you're used to people just telling you things, this train of logic blows.

I can't think of anything else. I hate how 31) this was a totally unsuccessful idea.

FOURTH OF JULY!! And we are GRILLING! No fireworks (see #18), but lots and lots of grill food anyway. We're going to make smores too, but 32) I hate how they don't sell graham crackers here, meaning we're going to have to make do with butter cakes. Should be fun. Hopefully the weather is good, I really 33) hate how we got so much rain today, it kind of sucked a little bit. At any rate, this has been a very food-oriented week; we went out for German food Tuesday, Marina cooked Greek food today, and tomorrow (well, today technically), it's American grill-ness! Going to Zurich on Saturday, working all day Sunday and Monday, and CLAIRE COMES TUESDAY!! Wooooot!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

poor tina. you can come up with 33 things you hate about germany, and yet, as soon as you get home you're going to want germany and all it's stupid things you hate back =P

-amy

p.s. i hate how you're getting tan and for some reason i'm NOT...wait...why are you celebrating the fourth of july in germany? i just remembered thats an american holiday...

Anonymous said...

you forgot a couple:....34.Germany does not have WAWA. 35. Germany does not have Austin.