Oven Racks

First year roommate was disturbing, roommate last semester was nonexistent, but Chinese Roommate is just weird. Not different. Just weird.

Among other things, Vegemite and I finally discovered what she was doing those three nights she kept us all awake. Apparently she was throwing a ball against the wall and not digging a tunnel to China as had previously been thought, and which, in retrospect, would have made more sense. I don't know if it's bizarre exercise that can only be done when the moon is full or what, but CR found reason to throw a handball against a concrete wall for four hours a night, 3 days in a row, and only at ungodly hours, namely 2 o clock in the morning.

The reason for this post is that I just got yelled at for using the liquid boiler thing in the kitchen to boil liquid. When CR approached me (liquid boiler in hand), and delivered her sermon on Why It Was Wrong For Me To Boil Liquid In The Liquid Boiler Even Though I Cleaned The Goddamned Thing Afterwards, I was like "Oh, p.s Chinese Roommate, do you have any idea where our oven racks went? Because I went to use the oven today, but the oven racks are gone and I can't find them." "Oh," said CR, "I gave them away."

I'm sorry, come again? You gave away our oven racks? You gave away our oven racks? Jesus Mary and Joseph Christ on a Sidecar with an order of the Whore of Babylon and everything else that is swear-worthy in every religious book on the planet. I'm all for helping the poor or what not, but it seems to be like a better idea to join the Peace Corps, Doctors Without Borders, or that organization that fixes cleft lips for a dollar. Or, if it's donating that you fancy, you can give money, give clothing, give old books you haven't read in years or toys you never liked from your childhood and write them off as tax-deductible. Personally, I'm all for adopting babies from Guatemala, digging ditches for farmers in Columbia, signing up for newsletters out of guilt, buying homeless people sandwiches, doing canned food drives, going to Bono concerts and hells-yes-ing Bill Gates philanthropy. Somehow I feel as those all of these would accomplish more than giving away the goddamned oven racks.

Seriously, what are third world children going to do with oven racks? "Gee, thanks Red Cross, I'm starving, my country's been ravaged by war, big business and western politics, I've had malaria eight times, and the one history textbook that exists in my single room roofless schoolhouse still says there's an iron curtain across Europe, but now that you've given me these kick-ass oven racks, I really feel that my life is going to change for the better."

Jesus Mary and Joseph Christ on a Sidecar with an order of the Whore of Babylon, I am so pissed off. But more than that, I just don't understand.